From Whom ALL blessings flow...

 I've thought alot about heaven since I read the book "Heaven is for real" by Todd Burpo on my vacation and it has forever changed my views on such things. Theres something about heaven that I've often felt not ready for and I think alot of it is that I enjoy this life so much that I don't want to "miss out" on whats to come. I want to see my kids grow up and see them have their own children. I've experienced so many wonderful things here on earth that I almost can not fathom leaving it. I would almost say that I have had a small fear of death and its solely based around my selfishness. After reading this book I mentioned I have a curiousity and joy about heaven that I never have had. I have a peace about what is to come and know that God created a place for each of us, created it that we might feel his peace and love for all eternity.

I recently visited my grandfather in the hospital, he has parkinsens and dimentia and it has quickly progressed. Its not easy to see the people that you love going through such difficulty, everything within you wants to just make it better but it doesn't work that way. Relationships are important, family is important and God created such things with purpose. When we arrive in heaven there will be a whole crowd of those gone before us that will welcome us with such pure joy and excitement that we will never look back. I know with all my heart that those we lose watch from heaven, not in a creepy "look out because your great grandma is going to see you swearing at the guy that just cut you off in traffic" but in a way that they are enjoying watching your life. My Dad's parents are in heaven and I know that my grandmother is looking down on her great grandchildren and loving them even from above. My grandfather, my mother's father, couldn't be more excited about heaven, he's ready. There is a sadness that comes along with this realization but there is a comfort and joy for me now that God's plan is more perfect than my own, and always will be.

Today is more of a serious post as I pray for the health within our family, my grandfather as he transitions into hospice care and walks towards the light of God in His perfect timing. I also pray for my aunt Debbie today, she has been battling breast cancer and had surgery on Wednesday. She is one of the strongest women that I know, she is named well =) If you aren't familiar with Deborah from the Old Testament I'll share a little. Deborah was a judge who led the Israelites against the the Caananites in a war that they shouldn't have won. God's power shown through Deborah overcoming the unlikely odds to give victory to those who were faithful to the one true God. My aunt Debbie's spirit is strong even when her body has been weak and I believe that God is showing His almighty power through her situation. She is fighting a battle that only God could overcome.

I had music practice last night at church, something that fills my spirit =) We were talking about God's direction in our lives and I shared something with the group that came out of my mouth but it wasn't really my words. "God is the wind in our sails..." Its an analogy John and I started using early in our relationship. John's family loves to sail so it came naturally for him to relate to such a thing. Its easy in life to feel like we're waiting for God's direction, waiting to know "what God wants us to do". John and I became a little fed up with waiting around for such an epiphany and decided that its much easier for God to direct us if we're moving. If He doesn't want us to be moving in a certain direction, His winds will redirect our path. The storms we experience can either make us better sailors or forever fearful of the water. I could go on forever about how this analogy works but I think the main picture is what is most important. As we sit in the boat we can either have our sails down as we wait for the waves to toss us around or we can raise our sails letting God's almighty wind direct us. Let me tell you it doesn't work to go against God's wind either, when we try to change directions and the wind hits the sail wrong it can be dangerous. But when the wind is perfect, the sail is full and we glide across the waters of God's grace. I found this picture of a lighthouse I took and kind of thought it was perfect to pull all my random thoughts together today. I started with talking about heaven, praying for my family's health and wrapping it up with an analogy of God's direction. When the waters are rough we look for the lighthouse (God) to guide us back to where its safe. My prayer for you is that God be the wind in your sails as you go through this life.

When I visited my grandfather my grandmother kissed him goodnight and sang him a hymn "Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow". I was given a gift that night as I experienced this moment between my grandparents. She was praising God among the circumstances, even though there is such heartache that comes along with it all, she praised God. Tears may have been present in her eyes but there is such a hope and love that poured out of her words to my grandfather. I praise God today for such a love and for the chance to see such a thing. I hope that God blesses my marriage as much as He has my grandparents. I put together a 50th Anniversary slideshow for my grandparents a few years back and this was the first song that played as it showed pictures of my grandparents as children growing up, getting married and having children of their own =)